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Monday, June 27, 2011

SF Meats

Hello friends, this is Joe.


I guess I should introduce myself. I’m Jesse, and I’m new here. But forget about me; let’s get back to my dear friend Joe. And that’s exactly what he is, a friend, to every man, woman, and child that has ever walked in to his fine establishment. Joe is the owner of SF Meats deli in San Francisco, and the man is just an absolute treat. He greets you with a smile and the daily special and it only gets better from there. Don’t know what you want today? Joe does. Don’t know how many home runs Barry Bonds hit during night games in 1999? Joe does. Don’t know what’s good today? Stupid question, the answer is: everything on the menu you big dummy. Also, Joe does.


You know what else Joe does?








This.

Now here’s the thing, I’m what you would call a sandwich man. I eat, on average, five to eight sandwiches a week. They are as close to perfection as food gets. They are delicious, versatile, and, most of all, delicious. They are the only food capable of covering every section of the food pyramid whilst remaining edible. Long story short: I eat a lot of god damn sandwiches from a lot of different places. So when I say these next words you should not take them lightly: JOE WILL MAKE YOU THE BEST SANDWICH YOU HAVE EVER EATEN.

Maybe it’s the roast beef, or the fresh turkey. Maybe you have one of the daily specials, like the hot brisket, or spicy Maui chicken. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is that it will be of the highest quality. It will have absolute perfect proportions. It will be served with SHREDDED LETUCE like the good lord intended. And in between your meat and cheese will be a thick slice of love, made by Joe himself, free of charge.

You’re welcome.

And Joe doesn't even own a sandwich shop; he owns a butcher shop and, as a fellow member of this blog put it after eating his first sandwich made by Joe, he’s kind enough to assemble these wonderful ingredients for you like only Joe can.

He is a greater man than I.

So if you ever find yourself in the area. Or even out of the area. Come say hi to Joe and grab a sandwich, you can thank me later.

1330 Ocean Ave
Ste 200

(between Plymouth Ave & Granada Ave)
San Francisco, CA 94112

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

A Delightful Morningtime Snack


Hello hungry readers,

Just a quick post today about a delightful morningtime snack that's quick and easy to make. It's perfect if you don't have time to make a full breakfast, or if you're completely hammered at 3 AM and you need to raid your fridge for something tasty.

INGREDIENTS:
• English Muffin
• Butter
• Tomato
• Muenster Cheese

PREPARATION:
Spread a bit o' butter on an english muffin. Slice two big pieces of tomato, slap 'em on the buttered muffin, and put a piece of Muenster Cheese on each half. Then pop those babies in the toaster and melt the cheese.

As we all know, the English Muffin was invented by Archduke Krinsky "Toesocks" Richalds in the year 538. After a long trade struggle with the country we now know as the United States of America, they were eventually legalized and can now be purchased at your local grocery store. It's quite a moving story.

That's all for today. I wish everyone the best in their quest to assemble this fine snack.
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